As a single mother you play the role of two parents and are responsible for all aspects of your children’s lives. You help your children to get ready in the morning, prepare their lunchboxes, drive them to school and activities, make sure they complete their homework, cook for them, and clean your home. Most likely, you are juggling all of this alongside a full-time job and other commitments.
Whether you are divorced, widowed, or are actually married but the sole provider for your family, the lack of financial support of a husband probably has you facing financial challenges, which can increase the stress you may already be experiencing due to your multiple roles and responsibilities.
I asked a number of single mothers how they cope financially:
The single mother of a 14-year old son told me: “As a single mom, my priorities have changed drastically. After getting a divorce, I had to make many sacrifices and cut as many expenses as possible in order to cover my son’s school tuition.”
“I try to be as cost efficient as possible by making use of vouchers and discount offers, especially when planning activities and outings for my child”, added the single mother of a 6-year-old girl.
While her friend and single mother of two teenagers shared: “I am lucky enough to receive support from my parents and other family members. This reduces the financial stress on me in terms of grocery shopping and household bills. Still, I sometimes wish that my son and I could afford to be fully independent.”
A recent study found that children raised in single-parent households do not have the same financial means, personal care, and parental support available to them as those brought up in two-parent families.
However, single parenting doesn’t have to lead to continuous financial struggles. Here are steps you can take to take control of your finances:
Plan your budget
Create a budget and regularly track your expenses to avoid going into debt. Start with listing all your fixed expenses and payments such as your rent or housing loan payment, electricity, water, internet, and phone bills, and school tuition to understand how much money you have left available to spend each month.
Track your spending
Once you’ve created your budget, start tracking your spending per budget category, to confirm that your budget is accurate. This will also provide you with a clear overview and understanding of where you money is going and can help you to identify expenses that you may be able to reduce.
Teach your kids the value of money
Clearly communicate with your kids and explain to them how hard you work to provide for them and what you can and cannot afford in a manner that can help them understand this at their age – don’t expect them to act like little adults. Once they are mature enough to understand the value of money, teach them how to budget and track their expenses as well and encourage them to work during their free time and earn their own pocket money.
Cut unnecessary costs
Work to identify and prioritize you and your children’s financial needs. Then cut any non-essential expenses such as unnecessary shopping and unneeded memberships. Your priority list will provide further financial clarity and help you to budget better and increase your savings. Remember to reevaluate your expenses as your salary increases over time.
Open a saving account
However, challenging it may be when you have so many expenses to cover alone as a single mother, opening a saving account and depositing a specific sum of money straight into it as soon as you receive your salary each month should be a priority.
Even just $20 deposited each month can greatly contribute to your kids’ college education or another major expense 15 years from now. Because the money in a savings account isn’t as easily accessible as money in your checking account you are less likely to spend it.
Start a college fund
Starting a college fund for your kids is a big investment, and it is best to start saving early on as then you can commit to a smaller monthly payment. If, for example, you start when your child is one year old, you may pay an annual fee of $1,000 into the fund. However, if you wait to start a college fund until your child is 10 years old, you will likely have to pay double the amount each year.
Being a single mother is challenging and stressful, and this stress is often increased by the financial challenges most single mothers experience. However, with proper financial planning and by living within your means, you can take control over your finances and lower your stress level. You will be healthier, your family will be happier, and you will be financially prepared for the future.
