For communities in the Middle East, sex is a topic rarely professionally addressed. When and if discussed, it’s done so in the privacy of the family home. What was once a Taboo is now a needed discussion. A negative attitude towards an active sexual life is nothing new for Middle Eastern communities. These teachings are integrated into all aspects of life. From schools to universities, kids are taught to perceive sex as an act of reproduction and discretion. In reality, sex is a natural part of human behavior and one that needs our constant attention. For women, studies have shown that sex provides many health benefits besides physical pleasure.
Shereen El Feki, a half-Egyptian Muslim Immunologist, took on the initiative to encourage women in the Arab World to open up about their sexual life. She ventured across Morocco, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, and Lebanon, talking to people about sex. Her findings were interesting, Shereen says in an article for New Internationalist: ‘My problem was not getting people to talk about sex, but getting them to stop.’ She continues by saying: ‘People were very eager to ask questions and to speak openly about their experiences. Often women don’t speak openly because they’re afraid of being judged, and they thought, with me coming from the West, they could speak with no judgment’. For Shereen, the problem was apparent, communities in the Arab World suffered from a discrepancy between reality and appearances. Quoting her Egyptian gynecologist:
‘Sex in the Arab World is the opposite of sport. Everyone talks about football, but hardly anyone plays it, whereas everyone is having sex, but no one wants to talk about it.’
When we remove the stigma surrounding sex, it is evident that sexual activity is an integral part of our human existence. Sex negativity is highly witnessed in teaching facilities, religious preaching, and government policies across the Middle East. Since the 1990s, a sex-positive movement in the United States has been on the rise to change cultural attitudes toward sexuality. The movement began as a response to the concerning influence of patriarchism on matters regarding sexuality. In an interview for Psych Central, certified sexologist Sarah Melancon expands on the mission behind the sex-positive movement, saying for feminists, “the goal was (and is) to encourage the healthy sexual expression and relationships of women and people of all genders.”
Embracing Sex Positivity
For some people, sex positivity can be understood as having an open mind about all aspects of sexuality. Others perceive it as approaching sexuality, health, and pleasure with no judgment or shame. According to Aida Manduley, trauma-focused therapist and sexuality educator, sex positivity is respecting and discovering the diverse essence of sexuality and gender within the boundaries of consent. Some ways of sex-positive behavior can be described as being open to exploring fantasies and building a healthy relationship with your physical appearance.
The World Health Organization (WHO) states that an individual’s sexual environment and attitude can heavily influence their mental state and well-being. Furthermore, the global health organization states that the spread of sex-negative approaches, whether by the media, society, religion, or education systems, is causing individuals to feel shame and guilt about their natural and healthy sexual desires. Sex positivity tackles the root problem behind ‘sexual shame’ and helps individuals move past these emotional and mental obstacles. Ultimately, this approach enables people to have a healthier outlook on sexuality, enjoy their senses, and receive emotional and physical benefits from a healthy sex life. Nicole Cirino, a reproductive psychiatrist and certified sexual health therapist discloses the importance of a healthy sexual life for women saying, “All women deserve to enjoy a healthy sex life.”
Adopting a sex-positive mindset is a physical fitness and well-being asset, especially for women. The Centre for Women’s Health lists several benefits provided for women due to a healthy sexual life:
• Lower blood pressure
• Stronger immune system
• Better heart health, possibly including lower risk for heart disease
• Improved self-esteem
• Decreased depression and anxiety
• Increased libido
• Immediate, natural pain relief
• Better sleep
• Increased intimacy and closeness to a sexual partner
• Overall stress reduction, both physiologically and emotional
Our physical, mental, and emotional well-being is a responsibility for us to safeguard. Restricting ourselves to norms and outdated conventions is a harmful attachment that hinders all growth opportunities, especially for women. Reaching out to a professional for guidance on the matter is nothing to be ashamed of.
Sexologists are licensed therapists that assist people with overcoming various forms of sexual dysfunction and relationship issues that leave psychological implications on the individual’s daily behavior.
People visit sexologists for challenges like:
• Sexual dysfunction,
• Sexual trauma
• Topics relating to sexual orientation
• Relationship issues influencing sexual challenges
• Adapting to sexually transmitted diseases
• Hypersexual disorder
Join us in empowering women to lead healthier and fulfilled lives. Our Women Wellness program offers multiple interventions, all conducted in a safe environment promoting dialogue and expression. 2023 should be about introducing positivity into every element of your life, first being a more open relationship with your body and desires. Look out for books, podcasts, talks, and events to educate yourself on the matter.
