Selfishness vs Self-Love

by Nancy Abu Jawdeh

Have you ever stopped yourself from pursuing your passion because it felt wrong?
Have you ever felt bad about doing what you love to do for a change?
Have you ever felt guilty about including some “me-time” on your to-do list?
For how long have you labeled these thoughts, these needs, and these urges as “selfish desires”?

Personally, this dilemma between what I need and what I should do has been my faithful companion for as long as I can remember, until it drained my whole energy.

I have always believed that “Giving” is the best way to show people we love how much we care about them, how much we care about their happiness and their wellbeing.

This is 100% true.

But, it is also true that “Giving” is not a one-way street, otherwise it will lead you to a roadblock.
As much as this act of giving can uplift your spirit, it can also destroy it once you find yourself powerless, unable to perform as before, incapable to handle all the tasks that you used to.

This new situation has the power to make you feel guilty, weak, unworthy unless you allow yourself to slow down, listen to your heart and be more compassionate, stretch your mind and be more receptive. This will help you accept new perspectives in life so that you can finally see things differently and more positively.

The truth is that you cannot pour from an empty bucket. You cannot give what you don’t have.

⁃ To give Love, you should be loved
⁃ To give Power, you should be empowered
⁃ To give Friendship, you should befriend yourself
⁃ To give Trust, you should have faith in yourself
⁃ To give Wisdom, you should accept yourself

It all starts with YOU.
Self-Love does not reflect Selfishness.
Self-Love shows Responsibility.

It is your responsibility towards yourself and others.
You cannot succeed in taking care of your surroundings unless you give yourself the time needed to recharge first.

Self-love is truly about giving yourself the time to:

⁃ Reflect
⁃ Listen to your body, heart, and soul
⁃ Discover your inner power
⁃ Embrace your strengths
⁃ Accept your weaknesses
⁃ Upgrade your skills
⁃ Fulfill your needs

While selfishness is defined as a lack of consideration for other people, revealed by putting your needs and interests above theirs; Self-Love is actually about considering your needs first so you can serve others better and longer.

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